Since I see where this is going to go,
What is the quickest way you could get fired from your job and not end up as a registered sex offender, or with jail time for that matter?Insulting your boss may be the best solution, or you can just send a letter of resignation
God damn it I just had to delete a four paragraph answer
Refusing to work, just sitting on a chair doing nothing even when asked directly by your boss
At many companies that’s not a quick way to be let go. The process would take some time.
At a government job it took an entire year to fire an executive assistant who did absolutely nothing.
Sometimes this actually becomes a quick way to get promoted for some people. I haven’t figured that trick out yet though.
Not wearing the minimum fifteen pieces of flair.
Scream “white power” while giving the Nazi salute every 20 minutes.
These days that could get you a promotion
Shit on the floor.
Gotta get schwifty!
Whip it out bro.
Step into a machine not locked out.
I have admin on our SharePoint and Teams systems. Just saying.
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Open every hydrant in town and leave. Or, open a bunch in different sections and close them as fast as possible causing a hammer effect and making the water mains break. Bonus if it’s next to a water tower. I’d never do that though, part of my job is to find said break.
Work for a fairly large ISP, I’m the main controller for cross connects for the entire west coast. Does the jumper that goes within a data center from ISP to customer. If I ordered disconnects on them some large players would go down.
Try to bang your boss. Either you get fired, or you get to bang your boss. Win-win
Banging my boss would be the biggest L of my life
