Or just “I don’t do drugs”, or “I don’t do recreational drugs”?
Or “I don’t smoke weed” and “I don’t drink alcohol” when they come up, separately?
I wouldn’t generally say it at all unless I’m in a situation where I’m offered recreational drugs such as cannabis or alcohol.
My understanding is the term ‘straight edge’ might be more well known than ‘teetotal’, but neither are completely known by everyone.
I take straight edge to mean not doing any recreational drugs. However I read that straight edge can have punk culture connotations that some people might maintain are part of it. Like I might meet a punk straight edger who claims I’m not really straight edge unless I have connections to the punk scene. They also apparently often claim you need to be vegan to be straight edge, I am vegan though coincidentally but not for reasons relating to straight edge culture.
Teetotal I believe most often means abstinence from simply alcohol, but can be used to mean abstaining from all recreational drugs (I think). It may be more well known as just not drinking alcohol. For example teetotallers often still smoke weed.
Apologies if I misrepresented any of these terms.
“Sorry, I don’t (drink/smoke/whatever - just fill in the blank).”
Alternately, no is a complete sentence: You don’t owe anyone any explanation.
Don’t say “sorry”. You have no reason to apologize.
Or “I don’t smoke weed” and “I don’t drink alcohol” when they come up, separately
That ones your best choice.
I live in Wisconsin, and if there’s one thing Wisconsin is known for is a strong drinking culture. I’ve had extremely good luck with simply saying “not tonight” or “no thank you” or at strongest “I have to be good for my drive home”
If you specifically identify yourself as a teetotaler or straight edge or whatever could be interpreted as seeing yourself as better than others who just want to experience an altered state of mind, which is not a good first impression to make.
I find that adding an “…anymore” adds a lot of baggage that’ll make people drop it and accept your choices
“Not since… The incident…”
“What happened?”
“I don’t talk about it… anymore…”
People respond best when you just say “no” (sorry to quote Nancy), and don’t try to excuse away your response. Just say no, or no thanks, or nah, or not today, and move on. If they pressure you tell them to back the fuck up.
My dude, I gave up alcohol 12 years ago and I can feel your question in my bones.
The only responses I’ve found that
don’t causeminimize follow-up bullshit are:“Oh I’m taking antobiotics at the moment and the doc said I can’t drink while I’m on them.”
and
“Sorry, I’m designated driver tonight! I know, it’s so annoying but I promised my gf/friends…”
Anyone you see frequently enough to know these are white lies should be cool with you not drinking/getting high anyway.
Yes, it’s bullshit that you have to lie but I’ve found that telling the truth just leads to drunk/high idiots pestering you and basically not accepting any explanation. Using the white lies above shifts the blame onto someone else, and then people just seem to accept it.
And if your friends don’t respect that you want to stay sober, then you can probably do without them in your life.
Get a jacket, get some Casey Jones, Have Heart, and early Refused (since you’re vegan) patches sewed on. Mohawk you’re hair, tattoo giant Xs on your hands, and go around picking fights with people who drink or do drugs.
Now you’re straightedge
It’s a situation where the label carries a burden. How often does it come up that you need a prepared response? No judgement, but If you’re thinking this much about it you might be hanging out with the wrong crowd. “No thanks” should be enough, and being pressured further into doing something you don’t want to do is a red flag. I don’t think either label is going to help you.
There is nothing wrong with using substances (that do not cause a debilitation addiction/dependency)
However, that doesn’t mean there is something wrong with NOT doing them either. There isn’t. It is absolutely your choice, if someone cannot respect that then you probably shouldn’t hang out with them at least in that context because they will keep pressuring you.
For instance, I do not like alcohol, when I go to get fucked up with my buddies, I am not drinking alcohol because the high sucks and the comedown+after effects suck even more. My buddies who know understand this, but I have had friends who absolutely did not understand this and would pressure me into doing it all the time. Needless to say, I don’t go and get fucked up with them anymore.
Oh, absolutely. I have no problem with other people doing recreational drugs. I see it as entirely their choice as it only really affects them personally. I don’t think it’s immoral or “sinful” (whatever that really means) or whatever.
And I think most people do respect that. I do appreciate these responses that make it clear that we should respect if someone either does or doesn’t want to consume recreational drugs.
But I really was just looking for a term to explain abstinence of recreational drugs to people who I know won’t judge or care, but without the baggage or misunderstandings that may come with saying “sober” (possible assumption: former/recovering alcoholic/addict), “teetotal” (possible misunderstanding: doesn’t use alcohol, might still be fine with other recreational drugs), or “straight edge” (possible misunderstanding: not only doesn’t consume drugs, but also is into the punk music scene).
After gathering data, the best term I could come up with is quite a simple one: “drug-free”. To be clear, we could say “recreational drug-free”, though that’s rather wordy and the meaning of “recreational drugs” is often understood by just saying “drugs” anyway.
I know you didn’t ask but I just thought I’d say this anyway lol.
I agree with most of what you said. I think the only time drug use can become immoral is if your usage brings legitimate suffering upon others.
Right, like smoking in front of a baby (and exposing them to second-hand smoke). I guess that’s a good example. But that’s more to do with the way you’re going about doing the drugs, rather than the drug use itself as an inherent component, I suppose.
If you’re in a party or other social event keep a drink with you, water or whatever you like. When someone offers you something just bring your glass up and say thanks, im fine. 9/10 times people are going to be cool with that. Someone might ask you what are you drinking, being honest is the best imo, you can start a conversation about it. Do not say things like “I don’t need alcohol/drugs to enjoy a party” it’s sounds condescending and like you’re moraly superior, you are not. If someone asks if you already tried, say yes but you didn’t really like it. If they try to pressure you, just leave, they are shitty people.
Straightedge is a punk subculture, so if you’re not into the music then I wouldn’t use the term.
“I’m a person just like you but I’ve got better things to do”
Just say no thanks. No need to tell them that it’s a life long choice.
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Could probably say that you’re sober 15 years. People tend to be more understanding of people in recovery